Prez Detecting Derelict Derriere!

The president made one of his more profound statements the other day in explaining why he was surrounding himself with the experts, to wit, simply so that he would acquire enough gravitas to know whose ass to kick. This is not hard to believe in that his supply of gravitas up to this point is marked by a meagerness that’s incomprehensible vis-à-vis the election of the acclaimed American messiah with smarts supposedly acquired at no less an establishment than Harvard Law, this country’s Oracle at Delphi.

He gives an idea of the amount of gravitas he possesses in that he has already – apparently without benefit of his surrounding of experts – kicked ass when he kicked Mines/Minerals Chief Elizabeth Birnbaum under the bus a few days ago even though she had nothing to do with the oil-rig explosion and knew as much about the situation in the Gulf as he does…virtually nothing in both cases. The president said in his “Gulf Oil” news conference the other day that the administration had been in charge of the oil-spill developments from the first hour, which means, considering the results, that he ought to pulverize his own derriere, except that he could throw out a knee in the process, making pickup basketball games only a remote possibility.

One could say that the administration has acted stupidly, taking a page from the president’s list of nonsensical uttering, but that might sound as racist as he did when he used that term last year vis-à-vis a white policeman whose ass he attempted to kick. Among his first acts when assuming office, Obama sent the bust of Churchill back to England that had been in the White House (Oval Office) for some time, indicating his gravitas concerning this nation’s best international friend. He compounded that with the silly gifts to Prime Minister Brown – 25 movie DVDs usually incompatible with British players. Perhaps he could look to Veep Biden for some ass-kicking gravitas but that worthy thinks jobs is a three-letter word.

So…maybe Obama, in this instance, is the current clone of former prez Jimmy Carter, who took a trip to England and while there castigated Prime Minister Tony Blair, actually accusing him of being subservient to the Bush administration. Carter chose his overseas trips as opportunities to flay this nation but Obama has added a new twist by appearing throughout the world to apologize for this nation and even accentuated this activity by genuflecting before the likes of the Saudi king. This was a profound show of gravitas since 15 of the 19 Muslim butchers of 9/11 were Saudis. In that moment, Obama’s derriere was prominently displayed for a good field-goal-try.

But back to ass-kicking! If poor Birnbaum had to get kicked under the bus, what about her superiors? Interior Secretary Salazar is supposed to run things down on all the ranches and ponds, seeing that all the hands get it right, but somehow the oil just gushed and gushed and…well there was nobody home at the ranch-house…or did it matter? According to Reuters of 04 June, “more than 50,000 wells have been drilled in federal water in the gulf since 1947. Federal water can vary by state, but is generally at least three miles (4.8 km) offshore.” The current spill is the only one of any consequence (50,000 to 1 odds) in 63 years. Does Obama understand just how relatively safe well-drilling is? No! He needs to kick ass because a lot of folks accuse him of not being angry enough, even though he told an interviewer the other day that he’s furious. That’ll show ’em.

Without doubt, his bevy of experts include those who castigated Kentucky republican Senate candidate Rand Paul the other day for saying, “Accidents happen,” accusing him of being insensitive to the Gulf folks and coal miners killed in his own state. He understands that things break occasionally so he simply stated an obvious truth. If he had said that Congress needs to kick ass, the president would have been impeached in a heartbeat for not – in a year-and-a-half – knowing how to lead the country in a time of crisis.

The oil catastrophe occurred on 20 April and the prez finally made it down to the Gulf on 02 May. Nearly another four weeks would elapse before Obama would venture to the scene again, after stumbling through a press conference and trying to explain why help and expertise offered from 17 nations had not been accepted. He’s been back, after that thrilling concert he hosted for over-the-hill-Beatle Paul McCartney, who stated as his swan song that he was glad the country, after eight years, had a president who knew what a library is. Showing his lack of respect for the office, not the individual, Obama did not kick McCartney’s ass. Shades of Jimmy Carter!